Some People Aren't Normal

If you can start the day without coffee,
If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,
If you can eat the same food every day and be thankful for it,
If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,
If you can take criticism and blame without lashing back,
If you can conquer stress without seeing a Shrink,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,
You must be my dog.